Archive for the ‘Road Rage’ Category

You’ve been warned.

Why the FUCK would you pull RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME (right turn on red) when I’m going 45mph, and THEN give me the fucking bird when I honk my horn?

Not only that, but this sack of shit could’ve pulled into the right side lane… the turning lane. Instead she wildly flung her giant SUV in front of me because she couldn’t wait to go. She also sped up pretty slow for having needed to yank her vehicle in front of mine.

I really hate other drivers on the road. What a bunch of dumb meat sacks.

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I say this as an American.

With the belief that I am one of a car load of Americans that actually understands how to drive in the things.

I could write 2 or 3 entries on my hatred of dealing with people in the things, as I have to use one every single time I go to work via the backroads (which is 99% of the time as it is always faster and ~8 miles shorter). But I believe today will be an almost finale-like entry that would make all others pointless.

Usually the problem is that no one else can tell where anyone is going. If they see a car in ANY section of the round-a-bout (including in front of them) they will stop and look around before finally creeping through as slowly as possible. It doesn’t matter if the person is 1 turn or 3 turns away, the moron in front of me will just freeze up in terror. Meanwhile I’m the only person I’ve ever seen able to tell if the person approaching my road is turning onto it or still circling. Apparently I must be a genius or have vision into the future, because no one else can tell that inside of turn = straight and outside = exiting. Generally I can alwats tell by their position, speed, and/or wheels. No one else can…. and I’ve never been wrong.

Each direction leading into the round-a-bout is 35mph. The speed limit of the round-a-bout is 15mph. Now I’ll admit… I drive too fast. I always go at least 4-5mph over the speed limit. I generally take the circle around a very fun 25mph minimum. Everyone else? About 5-7 mph.

Today came great fun via a person that took the cake… and then set it on fire.

The man in front of me saw the roud-a-bout he was approaching, and immediately started to slow down WAAYYYY too early. I guess he was confused and had no idea what it was. Now replace guess with “know for certain.” As he got to the round a bout, which was empty and had no cars visible in any direction, he came to a complete stop. He then sat there a moment, and looked left and right. Next, he turns on his blinker. After that? Looks left and right again.

Finally he rolls forward and begins his circle. I’m already foaming at the mouth by now, staring at the clock (quickly approaching the beginning of my shift) in between trying to eradicate his car with eye lasers. To make things worse, I realize he is going so slow my car can barely handle first gear. He wasn’t even going 5mph. Finally he gets to the second turn, the same one I need. Reaction? He stops, turns on his blinker, and then LOOKS BOTH WAYS. In a one way round a bout (which was still empty). Dear God, how does he manage to open the front door of his house?

He then finally leaves and drives the rest of the way at 25mph (including the section soon after where the speed limit goes up to 45.

I really don’t think it’s possible for doing worse. Yet I’m sure there are some people out there who stop at every turn and/or try to go the wrong way around. People are too stupid and incompetent not to.

Now I have to get back to my wonderful shift.

We had the other person in my half of the store call out.  On a Saturday.

This is the 9th time in a row my shift was screwed by a call out too.  Why?

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So today I went to the grocery store for a few various things.

 

Upon pulling down my usual aisle (I am a creature of habit), I notice someone driving down the middle of the lane towards me, if not a little in my lane.  I go ahead and start moving my vehicle to the right to give this person who, apparently owned the whole lane, room to drive past me.  I have to stop as they slowly start moving towards me and block me from moving forward.

 

I wait a few seconds, and the person actually mouths: “Move out of the way” at me.  What?  Here I am, so far to the right that I’m actually IN PARKING SPACES BEHIND PARKED CARS and this person wants me to move over when all they have to do is move their car to the right by about a foot.  I end up pointing at the space wide enough for two cars to my left and yell back: “MOVE OVER YOU DUMBASS” and they finally drive off a moment later.

 

I feel sad that this isn’t some rare event, but something that happens about once a week.  Granted, I usually only have to deal with it at the mall where everyone goes to worship their shopping god.

 

#getidiotsofftheroad

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